Remember those baby books your husband never read? Or those classes that
he would rather have stayed home and watched football than go to? Yea, me too.
The truth is we as Mother’s spend 9 months preparing for the baby. We budget
our finances, we buy the crib and diapers, we take Lamaze classes, we read
numerous articles, we talk to other Mom’s and ask for advice, WE PREPARE. Most
guys aren’t like us, they won’t read the books and they won’t feel prepared. If
your husband is the guy that reads the baby books, consider yourself lucky. Do
you blame them, though? After all, you will be the one going through labor,
which the anticipation of the most painful day of your life can make you want
to be as prepared as you can be.
You know that saying.. “Women become Mother’s when they find out they
are pregnant, and men become Father’s when the baby is born.”
It’s true. For some men, it will take a week or a month for those “daddy
instincts” to kick in. These are a few tips for new Daddy’s. If your hubby
won’t read this, just try to explain these things to him. Good Luck!
1. Take
Time Off Work. Be
prepared to leave work for at least a week. You will need to be there when your
wife and baby are in the hospital. It is also important for you to spend
bonding time with your baby. Take a week to help the mommy out and get to know
your little baby.
2. Stay
At The Hospital. For all that she just went through, don’t leave your
wife alone while you go home and sleep. If you have kids try to get someone to
watch the while you’re at the hospital.
3. Clean
Up Around The House. A new mom will be going through a lot. They will need to rest and
recover from labor. She won’t have time to do the laundry, vacuum, do the
dishes, or take care of any pets you have. Her time needs to be dedicated to
learning how to take care of her baby, bonding with her baby and recovering
from labor. If you are horrible at cleaning, or just hate it, try buying
disposable dishes so you don’t have to do the dishes.
4. Get
Her Food. A
new mom shouldn’t drive for 6-7 weeks after labor. Go to the store for her, ask
her what she wants and make sure to pick up lots of food. A breastfeeding mom
needs to eat just as much as a pregnant woman. She is still eating for two, if
she’s breastfeeding! Make sure she has time to eat, watch the bay for her so
she can relax and eat dinner. If all else fails, order take out!
5. Offer
to Help. There
might not be much you can do, but always ask. Even the little things count, so
if she asks you to just hand her things or wash her breast pump for her, do it.
Trust me, she will be exhausted.
6. Take
the Night Feeding. If you are bottle feeding your baby, try to take turns
during night feedings. Everyone needs sleep! If you are breast feeding, ask if
she can pump before she goes to bed, so you have one bottle for a night feeding.
7. Bond
with Your Baby. You may not think that they will remember this, but
bonding as a baby is very important. It lets the baby know, that you will meet
their needs too, not just mommy. Take the baby and let the new mommy get a nap,
or a shower, or go out by herself for an hour (even if it is just to the
grocery store). Take these opportunities as bonding time with your baby.
8. Be
Prepared to Make Emergency Store Runs. Even if that means going in the middle of
night. Trust me, there will be a time when your wife or the baby needs
something now and you need to go get it. Be prepared to buy the stool
softeners, pads, diapers, or diaper rash cream.
9. Be
Supportive. If
all else fails, be supportive. A new mom might cry, or be mad, or be stressed..
just go with it. Be there, be supportive. Don’t argue with her. Even you being
next to her will probably make her feel better. Talk to her; ask her how her
day was. Take her for a date night when you’re ready to leave the baby. But the
most important thing to remember is to be supportive!
I would love for you to comment! What is your
best advice for a first time dad?
Thank you for sharing these pointers! It is true that taking care of the kiddos can be a terrifying experience for first time dads. But as the old folks say, we have to conquer our fears. Learning and asking about baby stuff is the first step. From there, daddies can advance to learning more complicated stuff about their babies.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment! You're absolutely right, learning and asking is the first step to being a new daddy!
DeleteThank you for posting! I will be saving this for my husband to read when we do conceive! We are trying now and I've been looking for great info like this to give to him. I know he's going to be a nervous wreck as a first time daddy!
ReplyDeleteThank You! Good luck to you both! Being a parent is the most rewarding experience!
DeleteMy bf knew NOTHING. He wouldn't change any diapers at first and then I realized he didn't know how so after I taught him he does it all the time... still freaks out with the super poopy ones which is weird bc hes a fireman and sees way grosser things at work lol
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing this blog. I think most husbands fail to understand the challenges a mother goes through in trying to bring up a child. While the child belongs to both parents, the mother shoulders a major chunk of the responsibility of the infant. This blog is sure to awaken a few would be fathers.
ReplyDelete